Moving Beyond Infidelity and Divorce

Christina R. Ferguson

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It's a Royal Affair - Part 4: Draw Your Own Box

Posted on May 30, 2018 at 11:00 AM Comments comments (0)

It's a Royal Affair

Part 4: Draw your Own Box




Meghan Markle shares the story in Elle magazine about her struggle with identity. She didn’t know what box to check. Her teacher advised her to check the Caucasian box because that is how she looked. Markle didn’t feel comfortable so she left the box blank. She shared this experience with her dad and he told her the next time this happens you draw your own box. I think we can all use the wisdom of her father and carry it with us everywhere we go!


When Meghan Markle entered the castle, it was simply breathtaking. I saw diversity in the royal world and I saw an evolution of love that started with Meghan Markle’s personal journey with self-acceptance. Through Meghan Markle’s blog known as the Tig, I was able to witness a little of her personal journey in becoming the woman that she is today. It was refreshing to see her boldly and freely enter the Windsor Castle and marry her Prince. Meghan Markle is living her best life and it showed!


As girls and women, we often struggle with finding our place in this world and sometimes convincing ourselves of our own worth is a full-time job that continues to be a process. We accept things that we shouldn’t accept. We say yes when we really should so no, and sometimes we say no when we should really say yes due to lack of confidence. We compromise our morals and values to simple fit in a box. This box may be a box that society has placed on us, a box that we are staying in to save a relationship that isn’t meant for us, a box that our parents and family have placed on us, or a box that we have created rooting from fear and limited beliefs. What would happen if we drew our own box?


The very moment that I got my first glance at Meghan Markle as she was riding to her wedding it made me proud. It gave me a little spark and motivated me to reevaluate my box. In my eyes, Meghan Markle redefined royalty. In a strange way she added beauty to adversity, and she made a grown woman believe in fairytales again!


This Royal Wedding will go down as one of the best days in history and from the perspective of a divorcee and a single mom it was life changing! I am ready to draw my own box with love being the center of it all. What box will you draw? What steps will you take to create your best life?

 

It's a Royal Affair - Part 3: The Message

Posted on May 29, 2018 at 11:00 AM Comments comments (0)

It's a Royal Affair

Part 3: The Message




Just when I thought that I was done with the tears, Bishop Curry sent a message that gave me butterflies. Love is one of my favorite topics to talk about. His message of love was powerful, and it really hit close to home. Bishop Curry used a historical day, a profound moment to share a message on the power of love. It forced me to reflect and reconnect with the magical essence of love.


When my life took a major turn that led to what I consider my demise, it was only the healing power of love that kept me alive. Bishop Curry stated, “There is power in love. There is power in love to heal and heal when nothing else can. There is power in love to lift and liberate when nothing else will. There is power in love to show us the way to live.” I began to reflect on this very truth and what that meant in my life.


I am grateful for the Royal Wedding and technology because it brought millions together in a time such as this. This union took the world by surprise because an American biracial woman that was divorced was marrying a Prince! A real life modern fairytale. As Bishop Curry says, “A young couple that fell in love brought us together, but love is more than that!”


The Bishop proceeded to talk about a movement that was grounded in unconditional love that mandates people to live and love, so we can begin to change our lives and the world around us! The Royal Wedding was a snapshot of this very message. Are Meghan Markle and Prince Harry a catalyst of change? How will you be a catalyst of change that is centered in love?

 

It's a Royal Affair - Part 2: In Honor of Doria Ragland

Posted on May 28, 2018 at 11:00 AM Comments comments (0)

It's a Royal Affair

Part 2: In Honor of Doria Ragland




The most memorable moment for me was watching Doria Ragland. That was also a proud moment for me as it was the epitome of sacrifice, love, and grace. Her presence set the Windsor Castle on fire! As she sat there waiting for her daughter to walk down the aisle I couldn’t stop my tears from falling.


If I may be honest, single parenting has been my most challenging job and it comes with many insecurities and fear. I came from a two-parent household, so this world looks totally different from what I am used to. I wanted to be a mom, but I can’t say I wanted to do it alone. Don’t get me wrong, motherhood brings me joy and it is a huge blessing, but I spend a lot of moments thinking, am I doing this parenting thing right.


I often get caught up in the horror stories of single parenting. The stories that say that children from one parent households are at a disadvantage and can lead to negative outcomes such as poor physical health, depression, suicide, poor academic performance, etc. I get so fixated on the negative impact of single parenting that I consistently stress about “doing it right.” I forget about the joys of parenting and sometimes still may miss the mark.


When I am surrounded by mothers and fathers raising their children together, I sometimes feel embarrassed and ashamed that my daughter will never experience this. I also feel judged. I must admit at times I am up late feeling guilty and sad that I failed my daughter.


As I watched Doria Ragland, I got lost in her radiant beauty and found peace in knowing that I will be okay. I had an epiphany. What if I focused on the image of Doria Ragland to conquer my feelings of single parenting opposed to all the other negative images? What if I showed up to motherhood everyday doing my best and being my best, instilling morals, values, and teaching her what love and humanity is?


Doria Ragland gave me hope and confirmed the fact that perhaps love is enough. Yes, Meghan Markle is now a part of the Royal family, but she was first Doria Ragland’s daughter. When I am in my 60s, I too want to be able to look into my daughter’s eyes and be proud of the women that she is. I want my daughter’s light to shine everywhere she goes.


It's a Royal Affair - Part 1: You Are Enough

Posted on May 27, 2018 at 1:55 PM Comments comments (0)

It’s a Royal Affair

Part 1: You are Enough




“I had never met her before, and at my very first audition for her, she stopped me mid-scene and said so simply, you need to know that you’re enough.” Meghan Markle, Darling Magazine


On Saturday I was glued to the television screen like many others. I predicted that the Royal Wedding was going to be a one of a kind event, but I didn’t know it would impact me in the way that it did. The Royal Wedding touched my heart in a special way and I am still trying to come down off the high.


During the Royal Wedding I saw more than the elegant wedding dress. I saw more than the handsome Prince that adores his beautiful Princess. I saw more than the prestige and their new roles as Duke and Duchess of Sussex. I saw a woman’s strength, courage, resilience, perseverance, and patience. I saw that Meghan Markle embraced her identity as a biracial woman and created her new normal.


As she first entered Windsor Castle, without saying anything, her walk screamed boldness! I noticed Meghan Markle’s vibrant and contagious smile throughout the wedding, the smile that showed the world that she knows who she is, and she is willing to let her light shine so that the world can see. The smile that showed she loves, supports, and honors her Prince … but, she first loved and accepted herself!


In Darling Magazine, Megan Markle shared the story of how she became exhausted in auditioning for role after role. She had a Ford Explorer that was breaking down on her and she had to enter the car through the trunk. Imagine that! The American Princess, Duchess of Sussex, knows what it is like to struggle and overcome! During an audition, April Webster shared these words with her, “You need to know that you’re enough.” These words changed the course of her life. Now, she is affectionally known as our American Princess!


How would your life be different if you knew that you were enough


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